SHE
Aries. 22yrs. NP grad. Rugby,
Tennis, Running, (Sports).
Tempermental. Silly. Sensitive.
Loves Chocolate. My Friends.
Music. Hates Liars & Laziness
MOOD of da DAY:
CARES.
HATES.
MOOD.
get from unkymoods
Lúthien Ancalime ;
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I've got tons of stuff to talk about!
H-Y-P-E-R
Yeah, indeed, darn super hyper fanatic today!
Geez.
Sometimes, i fear of my tempermental mood swings having to cause some readers' heads' reeling.
Simply inevitable.
This site's my baby, my life!
Can't leave without it,
Can't do without it,
'Cos it's where i spent my moments of tranquility and agonies at!
Blah~
Firstly,
Trixie! I can all so slurp you up!
This babe made me my very first blinker with my nick engraved!
I am all so touched ya know that gal?
I'm so dumbfolded!
Thank you for being such a comfort when i'm down in my pits.
=HUGGIEZ=
And this goes out to:
Lunacy:: Thanks really! You are really sweet! And i mean it! =p
Siew, Twinke, Miyona and Rai:: You gals really make my day. Each time i feel a total wuss arse, all i need is just to read ya words of encouragment and care. I'll feel so much better. Love ya'all! <3
YESTERDAY.
I cried my eyes out.
Was most tempted to take a cam pic of my teary self.
Crazy. I know.
But i'm just being human.
There's no way i'll be grinning like a chimp 24 hrs, 7 days, a YEAR!
It'll be absurd and deceiving isn't it?
Sigh.
Win did what he wanted to do.
I didn't do much except SMS him to read my blog.
I guess i freaked him out boisteriously.
I am very sorry about it.
But i meant what i say, cos you have no idea what i've been through.
If mistakes are made for the better, i won't regret a single moment of it.
Maybe i'm being too self-centered, raving nothing but myself.
Darling...
In fact i do care a zillion times about you.
You simply have no idea.
It's addictive.
I admit.
I do loose my cool 'cos of being too impatient and impulsive over my needs and wants.
Mom says i'm alot to handle. So did you.
I agree.
Tryin' to deal with that.
Really....i will try...really try...
Help me okay darLing?
Just like how ya pulled me through my depression long time ago.
The best thing of all was having ya to stay up for the night to keep me company.
Your smell lingers.
*stuck my nose in the air...*deep breathes...
Ahhhhhhhh
Win drink loads of water and rest well.
Too much of both studying and games harm.
Get well real soon!
I love you.
6/27/2003 02:45:00 PM
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Wednesday, June 25, 2003
My life.
It gives me headache.
GRrrrrrrrrrr........
6/25/2003 09:26:00 PM
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If YOU are reading THIS....
MInd YOU....don't even think of fleeling down to my place thinking that it works all the time!
You should be GOD DAMN ashAMED of yourself!
Each and everytime, you do it!!!!
Such tricks don't work anymore DUDE!
I'm making this clear and THOROUGH so you GET IT BRother!
YOu don't just fled to MY PLACE seeking for HARMONY when you UPSET ME...
AND someday later.....it happens....and you DO IT ALL OVER AGAIN!
I'm NOT gonna BUY THAT anymore!
SICK of 'em!
GET IT?
6/25/2003 04:27:00 PM
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WHy bother to post toothy grinning like a monkey pictures to my cam archives when i am HURTING and CRYING most of the time?
I might as well post my teary face.....totally upfront and personal isn't it?
FUCK.....
I just wanna load a gun and kill myself!
6/25/2003 04:07:00 PM
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HOW THICK CAN YOU GET?
HOW DARE YOU HAVE THE CHEEK TO EVEN ASK IF I'M ANGRY OR NOT WHEN YOU KNOW....YOU KNOW IT DEEP DOWN THAT I'M UPSET!
HOW CAN YOU?!
YOU CAN SERIOUSLY MAKE THE GAL WHO LOVES YOU CRY ALL THE TIME!
WHAT ARE YOU?
I'VE TO ACT LIKE I'M COOL ABOUT EVERYTHING WHEN I'M TRYING SO HARD TO SWALLOW THE LUMP DOWN MY THROAT.
I'VE TO SUCK IN MY TEARS WHEN THEY ARE READY TO BLAST.
YOU DON'T GIVE A FUCKING DAMN DO YOU?
EXCUSES!
YOU ARE SO MANY OF IT.
EXCUSES!
THEY ARE LIKE THE BLOOD FLOWING IN YOU!
I'M VERY VERY VERY FUCKING UPSET.
I WON'T FORGIVE YOU.
NOT NOW!
Last night,
you got so FLUSTERED and NERVIOUS,
YOU JUMPED from one explaination to another,
Coming out with tons of excuses and suggestions that you'll come today instead.
Here i am waiting foolishly....
YOU know something?
FORGET IT!
I'm so sick of it!
I'm FUCKING tired.
I had enough.
Damn i LOVE you so much alright!
You don't see me shelving you away when i'm caught with my friends or what ever SHIT!
DO YOU?
ANSWER ME!
DO you?!!!
Now if YOU'LL excuse ME....
I'm gonna have a good cry....
Mark my words.
YOU aren't going to BUY your way through.
I WON'T FORGIVE you....
6/25/2003 04:01:00 PM
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I've written a one and a half page of blog.
And i forgot to post it before publishing it.
Lost all the pain streakening details.
Heck.
It's all about Win and me.
I'm tired.
I'm just gonna submit myself to the exhaustion.
Since my previous blog wasn't meant to be published.
So be it.
I can't be bothered anymore.
Such emotional strains can really suck all the blood in me.
I hate having to feel most loved on the first day.
And feeling like thrash on the second.
Drowning...
6/25/2003 02:15:00 AM
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Tuesday, June 24, 2003
It has been really encouraging and comforting.
Meanwhile i've reconstructing my webby.
Roam around!
Enjoy ya?
Gimme some comments alright?
Cos i'm still trying to figure my way ard with web designing and all.
Miss you all darlings.....
To my honey bunny, you have no idea how much your undivided attention and deepest love have overwhelmed me.
I've been a pig these days.
I'm sorry.
Be it of needs, or for some relaxation, i can give ya my best massagesss just the way you like it.
Hiaks....oh yeaH baby!
Cos looking at ya drool and to even fall asleep while i pound ya back is really a contented job.
LOL
-muacks-
All right, Mom's being a real cookie today.
She's bringing me out to town to shop.
*Frowns...
we ARE taking the bus though, 'cos mom's "slightly" poory on her sense of direction!
Opps...bleah.. =p
Gotta scram and bath!
Seeya all tonight!
Till i blog again.......
6/24/2003 04:43:00 PM
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Monday, June 23, 2003
Not gonna see him today already.
6/23/2003 03:37:00 PM
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It's a discrete sense of feeling.
Lousy.
Feeling that i'm aging every single minute.
Evening was good.
Hang out at Queensway Shopping Centre to buy shoes with my mom.
Thought it'll turn out dull and listless.
'Cos it's pretty obvious that ,we, mom-daughters have different tastes.
In fact, it was far from monotonous.
We yakked...talked...gossip way alot!
Enthusiastic.
I've related and fill her up with much details of my life.
Since she's keen, i'm like "why not?"....haha...
It's always really sweet and nice when my mom really sits and gives me total attention, listening to what i've got to say.....
And WITHOUT INTERUPTING...of coz..
LOL
Pleasant.
Night falls.
What happened moments ago really made heartache awfully alot.
It may not be the first time, but i'm just waiting to see when i'll snap.
When it gets over stretched way too much, it'll snap.
It just too overwhelming for words.
Right now, i'm just trying to suppress it down.
Hoping that it'll be buried.
But then again, who knows when the rain comes and washes all the sand away,
it'll re-surface again.
Some problems are just so teething.
Hot tears stung my eyes.
It hurts alright.
I feel downright lame and helpless.
Win's words are swirling in my head.
"Can ya stop using me as an excuse?"
"You are alot to handle."
"I fear that one day ya just get tired and leave."
"Can ya stop critizing my mum? It gets on the nerves."
That does it.
I had to cry.
I needed to.
So scarred
You know how it feels?
Feels just like a little gal being chided.
It's so harsh.
I just feel so dejected and being an irritant to you.
Noble i'm not. Neither am i that magnanimous to take the blames and faults.
I loathe having to be always the cause of oppressive arguments.
It's draining and tiring.
Weary.
My heart's burning for ya.
As it sinks deeper, i'm loosing myself slowly.
It's so down right to the core that i really love you.
It's wholesome.
6/23/2003 02:20:00 AM
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