SHE
Aries. 22yrs. NP grad. Rugby,
Tennis, Running, (Sports).
Tempermental. Silly. Sensitive.
Loves Chocolate. My Friends.
Music. Hates Liars & Laziness
MOOD of da DAY:
CARES.
HATES.
MOOD.
get from unkymoods
Lúthien Ancalime ;
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Lúthien Ancalime ;
Lúthien Ancalime ;
Liquid Kitchen not counted.
(...though you paid quite abit!)
Today's the 6th day.
I feel like crying baby...
Spilling tears like a 3 year old.
Why wouldn't i be able to do that....
It's so painful inside, keeping everything to myself.
I can't keep going places can i?
How am i to swallow it all down.
I'm probably contradicting myself both ways.
Fighting it and succumbing to it.
Need you so badly.
Yearning to see you so badly.
But i can't....i can't...i'm so scared...
You used to say everything's okay,
telling me not to be scared and that i won't lose anything,
and that its not a dream.
I know, i've not been good either.
Throwing dramatic tantrums at you.
Storming off, jumping out of the car,
being too temperamental and impatient and implusive.
I've remembered you saying about trying to get used to my behaviour.
Was i so naughty? i realised you've never express your dislikes about me.
I know i'm no perfect angel.
I know sometimes you hate my guts when i ask stupid questions about us.
I know you just wanna be fair.
I know you wished you knew what to do.
I know you enjoy my company that's why you never stop seeing me.
And i know why you dropped me,
'cos you realised that you don't love me.
But, i know i love you this much.
If you were ever gone, you'll know i'm still here.
4/29/2006 12:08:00 PM
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It's devasting.
No signs to read.
No traces to follow.
Worst still, nobody to bother.
Getting lose up there in the head.
Should i or shouldn't i?
Just wanna cut all these bullshit away and get down with it.
And just do it.
I'm so screwed.
Or perhaps i'm long pronouced dead already.
4/29/2006 12:44:00 AM
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Friday, April 28, 2006
Don't like screwed up plans.
Can't ask too much, since everyone's mugging for exams.
BUT me.
I wish i've a car righttttt this instance, and that i can drive.
I'll probably sleep in it too.
Another stupid friday.
Inkriwang!!!! Better get back to me soon!
(Whooops! Did i spell it right? hAhaha!)
Good hair day today.
Wasted it at home.
4/28/2006 11:25:00 PM
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I couldn't wait to get out.
*grimaces*
Sitting ....waiting....wishing....
Feeling alittle goggy from yesterday.
Booze and late nights.
"You mixed me up for someone
Who'd fall apart without you
Yeah you broke my heart for the first time
But I'll get over that too
It's hard to find the reasons
Who can see the rhyme?
I guess that we where seasons out of time
I guess you didn't know me" - Delta Goodrem - Not me, Not i
The song's everything i know.
Did i say i miss you?
Okay, i do. =)
I got my test back!
I passed! YeAh!
Next one coming up, shall ace for that.
Heh. Wondering if i'll go church with Sau tmr.
Miss my little babe. I'll try to go tmr.
Surprise surprise suprise....
Minqi asked if i'll wanna chill tmr night.
Miss sec sch mates, i'll see about that.
Win's DXO birthday party as well.
My last summer touch rugby match tmr too.
Everyone's practically filling up my life right now!
You. you. you. you.
Grateful to ya'll who's been checking out on me from time to time.
Dropping notes and leaving traces so i'll know where to go when i'm lost.
I believe in angels.
God's gift.
4/28/2006 04:03:00 PM
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Thursday, April 27, 2006
Pain.
Gastric.
Can't sleep.
Oh no.
4/27/2006 01:40:00 AM
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You peeps know just who you are.
In darkness, you shine.
Litting up my world.
My blessings.
Friendship.
*urgh*
gastric.
Better scram before it gets worst.
4/27/2006 01:10:00 AM
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Tuesday, April 25, 2006
Yakun's still the best.
Mum's been asking.
Hearing the name, it hurts like pins and needles on the skin.
I love him.I miss him.I care about him.
I probably don't fall within any of these to him.
HAhaaaa.
Having a back and neck ache.
I must have been too tired.
At least i battled my attack last night and slept through it.
Neitherless, i'm prepared.
In the day, curtains drawn out wide allowing a view of the outside.
My room's litted up so bright that i don't need the lights.
Thus, i won't feel kept in.
Even when night falls, i'm only gonna draw the curtains right before i hit the bed.
Most probably, i'll try not to stay home..well..just in case i cave in again.
Weighed myself over and over again.
53.5kg.
WOAH.
Coaching later. Thank goodness Jasmine's around.
She's the man. Trust her with the job, i'm disposable.
Right after, gonna rush home and grab some stuff.
Project in the evening.
Just gotta keep myself packed. From dawn to night.
4/25/2006 10:28:00 AM
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Monday, April 24, 2006
We ran round the neighbourhood.
Till we were breatheless and dead tired, we stop by the stadium for water.
I wanna give her a big tight hug.
She's more than anything i can ask for.
i can't express how much you all mean to me.
Xia and Sau.
Two of a different kind. Both ultimately special to me.
Xia. What would i have done without you.
And i think i'm looking forward to the coming weekend already.
4/24/2006 05:04:00 PM
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Having a relapse.
It used to only occur when i was much younger,
especially when i'm down with bad illness and fever.
Came back faithfully in the year 2001.
And again in 2003.
All, in due to the emotional stress that i couldn't handle.
No idea how it came about last night.
Had breathing difficulties, followed by an acelerated heart rate.
Woke up to get hot water.
Stood by the living room window in darkness.
Walking thru and fro in the house.
I had almost bolted out of the door to the open.
It's not something new to me anymore.
Fighting hard to seek peace within and sleep.
Such signs of distress calls are getting familiar.
4/24/2006 09:57:00 AM
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4/24/2006 12:47:00 AM
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Sunday, April 23, 2006
Phelgm's choking my breathing tube and my throat.
Heart's beating.
And i'm still breathing.
That's all for today, i'll pack up the rest of the energy for a good run tmr morning instead. People do actually die from minor coughs and flu while exercising!
Not worth it, i shall rest for the day.
I've been thinking through and thoroughly.
And i've made up my mind.
Sick of not knowing what to do.
Sick of all the confusion that's sending me in circles.
I love you, still.
I certaintly do.
Even if i look like a fool to the rest of the world.
I believe in it, and i will die in the name of it.
True enough, love has done me wrong uncountably.
Given another chance, i'll just end up doing the same thing.
my favourite picture of you and i, both.
"Baby, when you're feeling all alone, just look back, cos i'm always right behind you."
4/23/2006 02:17:00 PM
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Made a trip down to a friend's place just now.
Such luck...all my peeps seems to be staying at Ger's area.
Can't figure if it's good or bad.
So you've guessed, i took the bet.
No matter what, i had to pass by that idiot's place.
I made cold honey drink....supposed to pass it to him.
Meant to cheer him up abit, for he must be feeling bitter over the lost of his match yesterday.
The car wasn't at the porch.
No one's home.
He didn't pick up my call. And i left.
The weather was so hot, that i ended up finishing half the bottle of honey drink.
Urgh!
4/23/2006 11:22:00 AM
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